所以铅笔才有橡皮头（伦敦生活）

我在刚开始看的时候评论这个剧是黑色幽默，到了最后才发现自己错了，因为这部剧一点都不黑色，也不幽默。

伦敦生活，英文原名是fleabag，好像是睡袋的意思，女主糟蹋自己就像一个已经积灰的睡袋随意的丢在哪里也无所谓一样的那种感觉。

她随意地跟人调情，当觉得参加派对需要有个男伴的时候就手机往下闪光灯一闪拍照群发，把自己当做公交车一样无所谓。

她喜欢顺手偷东西，即使是姐姐家的卫生纸也会在离开时顺走。

她有一家小小的咖啡馆，会来咖啡馆的人也不过是什么都不点只是会不紧不慢在插座上插满了充电头的人。然而其实即使客人被店里的豚鼠吓着觉得不干净，她也只是不紧不慢的抱起豚鼠装进笼子。偶尔来一个客人要一个三明治，她直接要高价，还借口没有零钱贪小便宜。

她有一个事业成功生活精致的姐姐，她却总是拿她姐姐喝醉酒时做的蠢事拿她开玩笑，即使对姐姐来说非常羞耻；当她姐姐尝试在道别时跟她拥抱的时候，她一挥手就打开了，一脸奇怪地看着姐姐，“I thought you were to hit me! Please don`t do it again, it`s not like us.”

她有过一个很爱她的男朋友，而她却总是在做爱的时候以自慰的方式达到高潮；他不止一次跟她分手，但每次都会把公寓打扫的干干净净然后收拾东西离开，而他也总是会留下一个属于他的东西，作为回来的借口，而她却在觉得公寓需要打扫的时候跟男朋友说“I think we are not good.”但在最后一次她这样戏弄的，前男友有了新的女朋友。

她的母亲因为乳腺癌去世，她们的教母变成了继母，在母亲祭日的这一天，继母一边称赞姐姐戴的仓兰美丽一边说“they are fitful for there”把它们放在了门口；继母一边说着“today Is a very sad day, let`s have some drink”然后拿来了香槟。

She had a pretty buddy call，he liked to come in from the back, and said she was the only one who accepted. And finally he can`t erect, and she thought maybe when a buddy call raised to a lover, such a complex relationship makes someone can`t erect. And woke up in the morning, he looked her in the eyes with a thoughtful mind, said, “ I have something to tell u, but..eh..maybe sometime later…” then later, he met her and said, “ about the thing happened last night, I think I fell in love with a girl…”

“and I should let go of all other relationships,”

Then she was dropped, and before the final sentence “her”, she thought the “her” is a “u”.

Her sister dropped by with her husband, which meant that she gave up the opportunity of working in Finland, which, was her drama working place with a excellent great high position, for the reason of her wired step-son who can`t leave without her, even when she had a bath and  the 15-year-old boy would drop in, and for her husband as well, all the more so because of her responsibility for the family ,despite that she told her about her husband kissed her sister in her birthday party and sent her a present which her sister stole from their step-mother and were to ask him to sold. Then, she went nonsense with no sound in her ears when she dropped the cups in the middle place of her step-mother`s sxihibiton.

看到这里，觉得这个女主就是把自己活成垃圾一样，今朝有爱今朝做。

这个故事还有一条时间线，她有一个很好的朋友，她们一起逛街吐槽对方的打扮，一起经营咖啡馆，她觉得自己应该对现状不满但自己又没能做到还继续混混沌沌而更加不爽自己的时候，小波拿起她的衣服出门，然后穿着她的衣服进门，说“say it, what u want to say to her, say it.”

图片发自App

小波死于自杀，她说是交通事故，因为小波说她要走到非机动车道上被一辆自行车撞倒，受一点小伤，然后他就会去医院看她了。然而自行车撞了她，她又被另一辆汽车撞了。

而她自杀的原因是男友跟别的女人上床了。

而这个别的女人就是女主。

---

我不敢说女主是一个品行优良的人，但是不知道为什么，当她总是强装自己很好一切都很好的时候，当她放走了继母家的猫的时候，当她拼命劝说一直关系尴尬的姐姐去芬兰工作的时候，当她说“i`m completely fucking alone.”的时候，当她尝试自杀而不得的时候，我还是觉得自己产生了一种悲悯的感觉，可能现在她身上所有的放纵和无所谓都是因为自责和孤独。整部剧自然是完美地诠释了人们生活的压力和无奈，然而我记得的却是小波说，因为人们会犯错，所以铅笔才有橡皮头。在故事的结尾，当她得到了银行的贷款可以继续经营咖啡馆的时候，可能也是她改变自责的方式，重新开始的一个暗示吧，谁又不会犯错，能够原谅自己这种话我还是不说了，但是，留下来的人也要学会消化这种自责的情绪，life goes on.

图片发自App