p2,chapter 3&4. 3.29

Winston 和julia 分开后的见面越来越难，给我印象最深的是julia让winston也要和她一样牺牲一些时间与其他热心党员一起参加一些志愿活动。她说这样做是值得的，因为这样可以更好的伪装自己。如果你遵守了小的规则，你就能打破大的规则。终于他们在一教堂钟楼下将之前的时断时续的谈话补充完整。julia 对党，对性和禁欲有着敏锐的见解。不仅因为性本能会造成一个自成一体的世界，那是党无法控制的，因此只要有可能，党总会想方设法把它消灭掉，更重要的，性行为被剥夺后，能让人导歇斯底里起来，这正是党所需要的，因为它能将人的这种状态转化成对战争的狂热和对领袖的崇拜。julia渴望自己能够建造一个隐秘的世界，在那里过上自己想要的生活，但在这种制度下她根本得不到她所谓的幸福。虽然两人心中满是叛逆，但是仍惧怕蒸发，惧怕死亡。

冒着厄运的危险，也明知是愚蠢至极Folly, folly, his heart kept saying: conscious, gratuitous, suicidal folly.最终Winston租下了the shabby little room above Mr Charrington’s shop.那个陈旧的小房间。这个房间专门为幽会而准备。伴随着老妇人的歌声，孩子们的嘻戏声，winston和julia度过了美妙的一天。最后文章写到Winston did not get up for a few minutes more. The room was darkening. He turned over towards the light and lay gazing into the glass paperweight. The inexhaustibly interesting thing was not the fragment of coral but the interior of the glass itself. There was such a depth of it, and yet it was almost as transparent as air. It was as though the surface of the glass had been the arch of the sky, enclosing a tiny world with its atmosphere complete. He had the feeling that he could get inside it, and that in fact he was inside it, along with the mahogany bed and the gate-leg table, and the clock and the steel engraving and the paperweight itself. The paperweight was the room he was in, and the coral was Julia’s life and his own, fixed in a sort of eternity at the heart of the crystal.他和julia不就是在寻找并在这个小房间里找到了他们的世界吗？