【若水雅思写作讲坛001】雅思考官9分原创大作文赏析-信息技术的利弊

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这篇雅思考官9分原创作文行文非常顺畅、严谨、环环相扣、毫无废话。文章个性张扬、拒绝模版、句式灵动、表达地道、自然和得体。

文章分为四大段，281字。第一段用一句高度概括题目论题的陈述引出话题，之后用ATM柜员机、网购、移动电话、互联网电话技术为例对话题进行说明，结束引言段的内容。

主体一段，作者主要论述信息技术对人际交互的正面作用。作者从专家对信息技术的吐槽切入，树立了一个论证的靶子，接着通过个人观察提出数码原住民一代在人际沟通方面比他们的父辈更胜一筹。具体表现在他们受教育程度更高、更加自信和擅长表达。同时他们的情商和智商也更高。他们与技术共生并熟练地应用技术大大提高了与他人交流的有效性。质疑权威和专家的观点，以事实说话若水君（薛媛老师）我认为是本段文字的一个亮点。

主体二段着重讨论信息技术对社会的影响，回应题目的第二个要点。本段作者着墨不多，首句正面回应话题后，作者立即引用发达国家金融领域大量使用信息技术造成的潜在技术依赖、危害、脆弱和风险来论证本段的观点。本段观点论述虽然只用了一个例子，但是这个例子非常典型，有效和充分地论证了第二个分论点。

尾段作者重述主题和个人观点，只用了短短两句话就完美地概述了文稿内容结束了全文。

此外，这篇9分雅思考官高分范文还用了不少高级、地道和得体的英语表达非常值得我们学习。比如：

1、Advances in electronic technology have radically changed the way we operate in many aspects of our lives.

2、While this seems valid from a theoretical perspective, I contend that there is no evidence to suggest that this is actually happening.

3、... from my observation...

4、My opinion of the effect of electronic technology on society is, I’m afraid, not as optimistic.

5、Take just one example.

6、Developed nations which use this technology have a huge dependence on it and this dependence creates vulnerability.

7、Imagine if the operating systems for world finances - stock exchanges, banks, etc. were disabled. The consequences of our dependence on these systems are dire in the extreme.

8、In summary, technological advancements have brought remarkable changes in the way we operate and communicate. At personal level, in my opinion, these have enriched people’s ability to communicate while at the national level they have created a dependence that is risky and potentially disastrous.

好了，各位雅思大作文创作小伙伴们，今天的雅思考官满分范文赏析就为您讲解到这里。我们下一期赏析讲坛再会。拜。