MY SOUL

Where is my soul?

Had i lost it?

Was it flewed away by the wind?

Did it disappear from the air or the rain cloud?

For the noisy world?

Or the dumb heart?

I feel shameful.

I feel i'm not independent,just like drifting seaweed which can only walk by the sea water.

22-years-old should be a hopeful and creative age.

But i can't feel a free and beating heart.

It's only an old man's heart.

When i saw the freshmen dressed up with green clothes for military training,i was just thinking about what did i do these years.

I can feel i'm dropping.

My life orbit like dropping from the hill,

Since the time i throw my soul away to the air,to the rubbish can,or just to someone else.

It didn't belong to me any more.

I want to keep my heart alone,without attempting to get into the crowd.

Crowd just made me feel i am lost,being other's followers.

I want to neglect other's eyes,and have the courage and confidence which i had when i was 10 years old,attending a primary school.I admire a lot who i was at that time.

Growing up made me have to considering many things. Maybe it made me adapt to the world,and maybe it made me just afraid the world.

During a long time,i can't hear what my heart says any more.

I just go with the flow.

What does this mean?

I am insisting that doing things with the flow at the age of 20s can be very likely keeped at 30s,40s or even more.

So it's another question i should think through.