网上约会成功的秘诀

译者 becky1110

7 Ways Men Can Be More Successful At Online Dating

7种方法可让你的网上约会更为成功

In the past I never believed in online dating and wasn’t a big fan of having an online dating profile. However, as I started getting really busy I decided to give it a try and put in a lot of effort into it. Surprisingly I started getting lot of success and meeting really amazing women. If you are a busy professional or would like to give online dating a try, there are a few things that you need to keep in mind so that you can have a positive experience. Below I have listed the seven key things men need to know before they start messaging women.

过去我从不相信网上约会，而且那时的网上约会还没有形成现在这样的气候。但是，当我开始变得忙碌时，我决定要尝试一下，并花费了很多精力在这件事上。出乎意料的是，我开始获得了许多成功，也会见了一些确实很有魅力的女性。如果你是一个繁忙的职场人士或者是你想要尝试一下网上约会的话，那么有几件事你需要牢记在心，以便你可以获取一次较为满意的经历。以下我列举了在男人开始发信息给女士之前需要了解的7个关键因素。

Be authentic when writing your profile

描述你的个人形象时务必要真实可信。

When you are writing your online dating profile, make sure that you are honest about who you are. Don’t try to write an “about me” section that has nothing to do with who you are. If you are not honest on your description, you will end up attracting the wrong type of people, which will make your online dating experience very frustrating.

当你在描写网上交友简介时，要确保你填写的资料属实。不要试着去描写那些与你是个什么样的人并无什么关系的内容。如果你的描述内容不诚实，最终你会以吸引不喜欢的交友类型而结束这一切，这会令你对网上交友感到非常沮丧。

Don’t use cheesy pick-up lines

不要使用不讨好的搭讪路线

Women get messages from men that throw cheesy pick-up lines all the time and those messages end up going in the trash. The key thing to remember before sending any woman a message is to be real and confident at the same time. Women can easily tell by the tone of your message of whether you made up a scripted a line or are actually really trying to connect.

女人从男人那里得到信息，她们总是会摒弃那些糟糕的搭讪方式，那些信息最终会被扔进垃圾当中。在给任何女人发信息之前，要记住的关键一点是要同时做到真实和自信。女人很容易透过你信息里的语气来辨别你是否依本而编还是真切地想试着建立联系。

Pay attention to details

注意细节问题

When I started online dating a couple of years ago I had very little success. One of the main reasons that I didn’t get many dates or failed to connect with women was because I never paid any attention to the details of their dating profile. As I really got more active on online dating, I started paying careful attention to their “about me” section. I noticed that many women had a specific passion they had that they wanted people to know about. I started to connect with women better when I took interest in their lives.  Don’t think that online dating is just a numbers game; it may partially be true but if you are sending messages without reading a woman’s profile, you won’t get quality dates on your schedule.

几年前当我开始网上约会时，成功机率很小。其中一个主要原因就是我没有较多的约会经验或是没有成功地联系到女士，因为我从来就没有注意到她们约会时的形象。当我真对网上约会表现得更为积极主动时，我就开始认真留意“个人资料”的部分。我注意到许多女人都想要别人知道她们身上具有某种特定的激情。当我对她们的生活感兴趣时，我便开始进一步地联系这些女人。不要认为网恋仅仅是一个数字游戏；它在一定程度上可能是真实的，但是如果你不知道一个女人的相貌而给她发信息的话，那么你的安排是无法确保可以得到有质量的约会的。

Make sure that your dating profile is grammatically correct

确保你的约会简介在语法上没有错误

Poor grammar is a major turn off. If a woman reads your profile and sees grammar errors she will question your intelligence right away. You don’t have to have an ivy-league degree or be an English major to have perfect grammar. Just make sure that you proof read what you write on your profile. Remember that when a woman comes to your profile she will read it once to see if it catches attention. If there are a lot of sentences that don’t make sense, it will show that you haven’t put in much thought or time into writing your dating profile.

糟糕的语法会是一个主要的转折点。如果一个女人读了你的简介后，发现了一些语法错误，她就会立刻对你的智力水平产生质疑。你没有必要获得常春藤联盟那样的学位或是必须是英语专业毕业，拥有完美的语法知识。只要确保校对一下你个人简介上所写的内容即可。请记住当一个女人看你的简介时，一旦发现吸引她的地方她就会阅读简介。如果简介中存在很多没有什么意义的冗长句子，这就表明你没有花费很多心思或时间来描写你的约会简介。

Establish connection before asking for the phone number

在索要电话号码之前要先建立联系

Many men will typically message a woman and try to ask for their contact information within the first message. Women are craving for connection and they are paying careful attention to how you communicate with her. They want to establish trust with you before they give their phone numbers out. If she feels that she cannot trust you, she will either ignore your message or will tell you that she doesn’t feel comfortable giving out her number.

很多男人通常会给女人留言，并设法利用一条信息来获取她们的联系方式。女人渴望与你联系时，她们会细心留意你会怎样与她沟通交流。在她们告知电话号码之前，她们想与你建立信任的关系。如果她感觉无法信任你，她要么会不理睬你的信息，要么会告诉你透漏自己的电话号码，会让她感到不舒服。

Don’t be afraid to flirt

不要担心调情的问题

Don’t think that setting up an online dating profile and messaging a bunch of women will solve all your dating problems. Communicating with women online can be just as difficult as communicating with women offline and if you come across as a boring person you won’t get a lot of success online. When I send messages I take the risk of flirting with women and I get a lot of replies because I am not afraid to show my masculine side.  Women get many messages where men ask, “How are you”, “How was your weekend” kind of stuff. The more risks you take in flirting, the more it shows that you are confident in your own skin.

千万不要认为只要建立一个网上约会的形象，并与一群女人有着联系就能解决你的所有约会问题。与女人在网上沟通交流和在网下与女人沟通是一样难的，如果你遇到一个令你厌烦的人，你的网上约会就不会取得成功。当我发送信息时，就承担着会与女人调情的风险，我得到了很多回复，因为我并不害怕展现我男子气概的那一面。从男人那里女人会得到很多诸如此类的信息“你好吗”，“你的周末过得如何啊”。你接受的调情风险越高，就越会显示你对自己更加自信。

Add Pictures that show your true personality

增加照片以展示你的真实个性

Don’t add pictures of you facing your wardrobe mirror and posing. Instead, add pictures that show who you really area. If you have a passion for being in the outdoors, you should add pictures of you by the lake or the beach. If you have a passion for going out at night you may want to take a few pictures of yourself and your friends at a bar or a lounge. You want to make the person that is visiting your profile imagine what the ideal day would be like with you.

不要添加那种你面向衣柜镜子摆姿势的照片。而要展示那些能真正反应你生活区域的照片。如果你对户外活动感兴趣的话，你应该增添那些在湖边或是海滩旁的照片。如果你喜欢在夜间外出活动的话，你可能想要选择一些你和朋友们在酒吧或是酒店大厅里的照片。你希望访问你简介资料的那个人可以想象出：她与你在一起的那天会出现的理想情景是什么样的。