My Favorite Questions for Making Tough Decisions
A good question can shift your perspective about your decision and make the wise path obvious.
When I face tough decisions, here are some of my favorite questions to ask:
Will this help me grow?
Would my best self do this?
Do I want the memory?
How will this sculpt my character as a man?
Could I reverse or undo this decision?
Can I test this decision?
My Favorite Questions for Making Tough Decisions
By Steve Pavlina
Sometimes you’ll encounter tough decisions that can leave you wallowing in indecision, such as whether to change jobs or careers, end a relationship, move to a new city, or pursue a new lifestyle direction. Sometimes all it takes to gain sufficient clarity, though, is to ask the right questions. A good question can shift your perspective about your decision and make the wise path obvious.
When I face tough decisions, here are some of my favorite questions to ask:
Will this help me grow?
Since growth is one of my highest personal values, I favor decisions where I can expect to learn and grow. If I see little or no growth on a particular path, I’ll tend to lean against it.
...
Would my best self do this?
Asking this question gave me clarity when I was trying to decide whether or not to uncopyright all my blog posts back in 2010. I had created a tremendous body of intellectual property, and I owned it 100%. But I often wondered what would happen if I let go of that ownership and donated it to the public domain. It seemed like a huge leap, and there was no good way to predict the outcome.
When I asked if my best self would do this, the answer was clear. If uncopyrighting my work would help more people than keeping it copyrighted, my best self would pull the trigger and do it.
...
Do I want the memory?
Every decision ultimately becomes a memory, and the sum of your decisions will eventually become a string of memories. So which memories do you want?
Do you want the memories of maintaining your current social media habits for the next 10 years? (It’s extremely rare to find someone who can honestly answer yes to this.)
Do you want the memories of keeping your current job for another year? What about your current relationship situation?
Do you want the memories of taking that trip, or would you rather have the memories of not taking it?
This is a really powerful question, and some people have gained immediate clarity the first time they’ve asked it.
...
How will this sculpt my character as a man?
I’m sharing this question the way I ask it, so feel free to modify it to fit your gender, or use a gender-neutral substitute like, How will this sculpt my character as a human being?
...
Could I reverse or undo this decision?
...
Some decisions are permanent, and you can’t simply undo them. If you quit your job or leave your relationship, you may not be able to go back if you later change your mind. But for many decisions, there’s a built-in undo. You can often return items you purchased. You can move back to your old city. You can buy back similar possessions to replace those you gave away. You can switch back to your old diet and exercise routines.
If a decision is reversible and/or the negative consequences of a mistake are low, then I’ll tend to lean towards the new experience. At the very least, I might learn something from it.
Can I test this decision?
If you can’t undo a decision, maybe you can test it somehow. Could you dip your toes into each path to gain more clarity about the options? Could you collect some real world experience before you have to commit?
...
Testing a decision can help you tip one way or the other, so you don’t remain endlessly stuck in ambivalence, where you’re constantly waffling about which direction to go.
* * *
Try asking some or all of these questions the next time you face a tricky decision. I think you’ll find them useful tools for increasing clarity and making better choices. When I’ve shared some of these questions with other people, their number one favorite is usually the memory one, so that may be a good one to start with.
http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2017/01/my-favorite-questions-for-making-tough-decisions/
朗读内容的原文请点击文末的“阅读原文”
朗读语音也可以去喜马拉雅听：主播王渊源John的清晨朗读会专辑
wallowing
英 ['wɒləʊɪŋ] 美 ['wɒloʊɪŋ]
v.
<喻>沉迷( wallow的现在分词 );热中于;在海浪中颠簸;快活地在泥沼中打滚
indecision
英 [ˌɪndɪˈsɪʒn] 美 [ˌɪndɪˈsɪʒən]
n.
优柔寡断;犹豫不决
lean against
英 [li:n əˈɡenst] 美 [lin əˈɡenst]
词典
（使）靠在…上;对…有看法;凭
intellectual property
英 [ˌɪntiˈlektjuəl ˈprɔpəti] 美 [ˌɪntlˈɛktʃuəl ˈprɑpəti]
词典
知识产权
sculpt
英 [skʌlpt] 美 [skʌlpt]
vt.
雕刻;雕塑;使成雕塑状
vi.
雕刻，雕塑
ambivalence
英 [æm'bɪvələns] 美 [æmˈbɪvələns]
n.
矛盾心理;矛盾情绪;摇摆;犹豫
waffling
v.
讲或写冗长而无意义的话，唠叨( waffle的现在分词 )