i finished reading so insane, feeling no words to say, don't know how to describe the experience, kind of being educated or appreciating a nice scenery, nice feeling from top brain to foot bottom.
another different perspective, angle, experience, to show you some different things/world.
i like his stuff, full of culture, buddhism, soul,divinity, i like this.
accident things happens accidently out of your thinking sometimes like my whatspp, i wanted to send him messages, but i didn't. cos i think i have not gained the soul things or perspective i wanted to follow, i didn't know what things would go, i feel not safe, so i didn't send, today i want to send but i have no chance cos whatsapp has been blocked on my phone maybe in china too. and one website seems the only one contacting possiblity with him disappeared too, i can not find that site, can not send to my friend in UK, we can not look into this possibility, i feel sad really, the fate bewteen us ended from here? dislike this if it is turth, i don't want to face but i don't know what rest i can rely on.
last night i dreamed i am fired by my colleague and boss and company, and no any one sympathize me, only myself support myself, very sad and pathetic. i think there is a fear in my deep, about now situation, i need to be responsible for my work in this place even if it has no pressure on me but i take on one position so there will be one attention i need to give.
but what several things i do is no related to this, so there is a sense of morality disobey, i feel not good, seems like i am stealing time or attention.
not every thing needs extreme conscious, but if principle things i need to treat it rightly with attitude and ways, this will make me feel better i think. so this experience is i need to face or look at what is it if i have fear, because this is the first step for solving problem. so, you need to face your thing, then face it, try to balance.
i saw one saying in that book, products, service, system, platform, eco/ecosystem, this kind of thinking, and careful market product, market capacity/tolerance, then growth speed, this strategy eyesight. this is one thing growth path/route.
growth is the fundamental key, be patient to yourself, you will be better and better.
i think i am like a cat being terrified over, too much fears in my mind though i me myself didn't know what are they, just afraid very, maybe borned/intrinsic, anyway i think i grown up now. i am not too afraid of something anymore. i am much stronger in my mind with my learned and experienced which give me sense of security. i build it little by little with some kind of awaring, thanks.
everyday your mind and body are in changing, they need nutrition, reading is your brain and mind stuff source. food is your body stuff source. do this well is important.
many things if you really have tried your best out, then let it go.
your things others' thing then god's thing.
dont be so mean to yourself, love yourself.
cherish what deserved, others are not very important.