【赏析者】罗罗
So there you have it—four possible ways to give first aid to a child in distress: by listening with full attention, by acknowledging his feelings with a word, by giving a name to his feelings, and by granting him his wishes in fantasy.
【段落大意】
现在我们有了四种立即回应孩子沮丧心情的尝试，一是百分百的倾听，二是用一个词承认它的感受，三给孩子的感受起个名字，四是给予孩子现实中不能实现的幻想。
【单词/词组/句型】
①四个动词 listen, acknowledge, give, grant很
But more important than any words we use is our attitude. If our attitude is not one of compassion, then whatever we say will be experienced by the child as phony or manipulative. It is when our words are infused with our real feelings of empathy that they speak directly to a child’s heart.
【段落大意】但是比话语更重要的是我们的态度。如果我们的态度里没有同情，不管我们说什么孩子都认为我们假惺惺或者盛气凌人。只有当我们的话语包含真情实感的共鸣，才能真正抵达孩子的内心。
【单词/词组/句型】
①If our attitude is not one of compassion 我不确定of 在这里的用法，查了很多都没明白not one of , of compassion,
②It is when ... that (cleft sentence分裂句)
分裂句是以it为引导词的强调句型，其结构为“It＋be的某种形式＋强调部分＋that/who分句”。该句型可以强调除谓语动词以外的大多数句子成分，包括主语、宾语、状语等。 分裂句还可以强调各种各样的状语成分，包括时间、方式、原因和地点。简直四项全能。
e.g. It waswhen it began to rainthat he left for home.
开始下雨了他才回家。（强调时间状语从句）
e.g. It wasvery reluctantlythat she agreed to help.
她非常勉强地同意帮忙。（强调方式状语）
Of the four skills you’ve just seen illustrated, perhaps the most difficult is to have to listen to a child’s emotional outpourings and then “give a name to the feeling.” It takes practice and concentration to be able to look into and beyond what a child says in order to identify what he or she might be feeling. Yet it’s important that we give our children a vocabulary for their inner reality. Once they have the words for what they’re experiencing, they can begin to help themselves.
【段落大意】四个技巧中，可能最难的就是倾听孩子的倾诉和定义它的感受了。我们需要练习和专注才能学会通过了解孩子所说的和没有说的话来判断他的感受。然而重要的是我们描述出他们的内心真实感受。一旦他们只能自己的感受是什么，他们就开始自我疗愈了。
【单词/词组/句型】
①It takes practice and concentration | to be able to look into and beyond | what a child says | in order to identify | what he or she might be feeling.
这句话句子很长但是结构不难，我尝试断句来理解它的意思。
②once 可以引导时间状语从句或者条件状语从句。.
e.g.Once you’re in here,listen to your teacher. 一旦到这儿来，就要听从老师的。
e.g.Once you begin,you must go on. 一旦开了头，就应该继续下去。
This next exercise has a list of six statements that a child might make to her parents. Please read each statement and figure out:
1. A word or two that describe what the child might be feeling.
2. A statement you might make to the child to show you understand the feeling.
【段落大意】
下一个练习是孩子有可能对父母描述的六种情形，请阅读和练习得出：1，用一个或两个词来描述孩子的情绪；2，用陈述的话表达你理解了孩子的感受。
ACKNOWLEDGE FEELINGS
EXAMPLE:
The child says "The bus driver yelled at me and everybody laughed."
A word that describes what he or she might be feeling: Embarrassment
Use the word in a statement that shows you understand the feeling. (Don't question or give a advice: That must have been embarrassing (or) Sound as if that was embarrassing.
【段落大意】承认孩子的感受
举例 孩子说“司机大声冲我嚷嚷，所有人都在笑”
用来描述孩子感受的词：尴尬
用含有这个词“尴尬”的句子来表示你已经明白他的感受。（不要问问题或者给建议）那肯定尴尬死了。或者听起来很尴尬
【单词/词组/句型】
①yell at 大声叫，嚷 『地道表达』
②That must have been和Sound as if 粗暴的背下来『地道表达』
1. The child says “I'd like to punch that Michael in the nose!”
A word that describes what he or she might be feeling:
Use the word in a statement that shows you understand the feeling. (Don't question or give a advice):
2. The child says "Just because of a little rain my teacher said we couldn't go on our field trip. She's dump."
A word that describes what he or she might be feeling:
Use the word in a statement that shows you understand the feeling. (Don't question or give a advice:
3. The child says "Mary invited me to her party, but I don't know..."
A word that describes what he or she might be feeling:
Use the word in a statement that shows you understand the feeling. (Don't question or give a advice:
4. The child says "I don't know why teachers have to load you down with so much homework over the weekend."
A word that describes what he or she might be feeling:
Use the word in a statement that shows you understand the feeling. (Don't question or give a advice:
5. The child says "We had basketball practice today and I couldn't sink that ball once."
A word that describes what he or she might be feeling:
Use the word in a statement that shows you understand the feeling. (Don't question or give a advice:
6. The child says "Janey is moving away and she's my best friend."
A word that describes what he or she might be feeling:
Use the word in a statement that shows you understand the feeling. (Don't question or give a advice:
【段落大意】第4句，load you down 为什么用 you我不是很明白。我理解是：孩子抱怨老师给自己布置了很多家庭作业。
【单词/词组/句型】
①sink the ball 进球，sink and fill (体育是数学老师教的，搞不懂篮球术语)
Did you notice how much thought and effort it takes to let a child know you have a sense of what it is he or she might be feeling? For most of us it doesn’t come naturally to say things like:
“Boy, you sound angry!” or
“That must have been a disappointment for you,” or
“Hmm. You seem to be having some doubts about going to that party,” or
“Sounds as if you really resent all that homework,” or
“Oh, that must have been so frustrating!” or
“To have a dear friend move away can be pretty upsetting.”
【段落大意】你有没有意识到，我们需要努力思考让我孩子知道我们在乎他们的感受。大部分家长不擅长说这样的话：
【单词/词组/句型】以上加粗的六句都是非常好用的表达，背起。
And yet it’s statements like these that give children comfort and free them to begin to deal with their problems. (By the way, don’t worry about using words that are too big. The easiest way to learn a new word is to hear it used in context.)
【段落大意】这样的表达可以安抚孩子让他们能够不受束缚的自我处理。同时不要担心他们不明白这些词语，他们就是通过这样的方式来学习新词。
【单词/词组/句型】
①The easiest way to learn a new word is to hear it used in context.
提炼句型：The easiest(最高级) way is to do sth is to do sth.
You may be thinking, “Well, in this exercise I was able to give an initial response that showed I understood—more or less. But where would the conversation go from there? How would I continue? Is it okay to give advice next?”
【段落大意】你或许在想，在这个练习中，我多少学会了一点初始的应对方式。但是接下来呢？如何继续？可以尝试给建议了吗？
【单词/词组/句型】
①give an initial response 和前文的give first aid to 可以同义替换
②Where would the conversation go?[地道表达]
Hold off on giving advice. I know how tempting it is to try to solve a child’s problem with an immediate solution:
“Ma, I’m tired.”
“Then lie down and rest.”
“I’m hungry.”
“Then eat something.”
“I’m not hungry.”
“Then don’t eat.”
【段落大意】先别着急给建议我 知道你有多项马上解决它的问题
【单词/词组/句型】
①Hold off 拖延 推迟
②tempting 诱人的 吸引人的
attractive, interesting, alluring