The sun was shining over the Plaça Catalunya in Barcelona in the late afternoon. Many commuters, pedestrians and tourists were moving around the place at the peak hours just like flying pigeons around the silver fountain. The woman was wandering slowly along the park, enjoying the end of a late afternoon sun. The man just came out from the subway station, the glaring sun was clapping on his face so that he could hardly open his eyes. Despite the burning sun, he suddenly saw inside the crowd, a few miles away, a silhouette which seemed very familiar to him.
“Hey, Jig! Is that you...?” the man ran forward to ask.
“Sorry sir, you must be mistaken.” said the woman with an impenetrable coldness.
She then turned away.
He grabbed her arm. “No, wait! I know it’s you, Jig!”
“Sorry, but who are you?”
“Jig, I recognized the birthmark on your neck.”
“Sorry, I don’t know who you are.”
The woman tried to turn away again, but the man grabbed her arm, holding her from the back.
“It has been five years, Jig. Five years.” he said with a trembling voice.
She detached herself from his embrace and kept some distance with him.
“Five years already? What a wonderful count.”
“Yes, five years, Jig. I have been counting the days.”
They looked at each other for a while in silence without knowing what to say to each other.
“How is your life going since then?” the man asked.
“Perfectly well. Much better, should I say.”
“Yes, you should say better.”
“Yes, much better. Thanks.”
“You don’t need to thank me.”
“Far from that. I think that you are actually the person I should thank the most.”
“For what would you thank me?”
“For setting me free.”
“Did you feel imprisoned with me?”
“I think that I felt more than imprisoned,” she sighed softly. “Indeed I felt that I was your slave.”
“Jig, I never saw you in this way.”
“Because you never really looked at me.”
Another moment of silence came. The man was still looking at her. She was looking away.
“I didn’t engage myself in any relationship since then.” He confessed.
“I’m not surprised.”
“You are not surprised at all?”
“Why should I? You are just like this suitcase you are always carrying with you.”
“This black suitcase?”
“Yes, your black suitcase.” She sighed softly. “You are carrying it with you, everywhere.”
“Is that a problem to carry it everywhere?”
“Travelers seldom find home.”
“Travelers seldom find home?”
“They are too focused on the journey. That’s the problem.”
“You know, Jig, I think that this was also a way to punish myself.”
“A way to punish yourself?”
“Yes, punish myself.”
“You needed to be punished?”
“Yes, I needed to be punished.”
“Because you committed a crime?”
The woman looked at him straight in the eyes. This time, he was the one looking away. The word that she just said seem to resonate again and again in the silence. The man seemed to feel ashamed about what she just said.
“Look, Jig, I know you must be frustrated.”
“I’m not,” She said firmly. “Not anymore.”
“But I was too young.”
“Wasn’t I?”
“I didn’t know how to be a father.”
“Nor did I.”
“I was afraid to be unable to take the responsibility.”
“You were afraid to bear the burden.”
“Jig, I feel empty inside now.”
“I felt the same.”
“I mean I feel incomplete, Jig.”
“I felt the same, five years ago.”
“I always only sleep on one side of my bed.”
“One side of your bed?”
“Yes, I always leave the other side empty.”
“Good to know. You must have bought a big costly bed then.”
“I’m still leaving a place for you.”
“One place wouldn’t have been enough, anyway.”
He turned his head towards the park. “Look at these swings in the playground.”
“They are already broken.”
“I mean look at them deeper.”
“I can’t, I didn’t sleep well last night.” She blinked her eyes and yawned at him.
“Look at these swings. Just a push, and it will get higher and higher, and then fly away.”
He made some exaggerate oscillating movements, up and down.
“Empty swings do not need any push.”
“I’m wondering how they tied it up with the ropes. It must have been a hard work.”
“You wonder too much.”
“I’m just wondering at the right things.”
“But you still wonder too much.”
The man looked back at her. “We could go back, Jig.”
She looked away, towards the playground. “No, we can’t.”
“We can start it all over again.” He suddenly took her hand.
“No, we can’t.”
“We could still love each other like before.”
“Did you say love?”
“Yes, love.”
“No, we can’t.”
“I still cherish the time we spent together.”
“I seldom cherish important person in this way. Don’t be so childish. It’s too late now.”
“It isn’t. I still love you, Jig.”
“You wouldn’t love me if you haven’t had the chance to encounter me in this park today.”
“You made a point, Jig. Can you see this fountain in the middle of the square?”
“What’s the matter with it?”
“It starts and stops all over again. It stopped yesterday night, but it started again today morning. Just now, right now.”
“I don’t see your point.”
Again, the woman looked away with disinterest, in the direction of the playground.
“Mommy!”
A little girl in a pink dress suddenly appeared from the playground, she was running towards them, screaming “Mommy, mommy!” and laughing with joy all along the way. She jumped on the woman, gave her a warm hug and a sweet kiss on the nose, letting all the marguerites she has picked to fall from her hands.
“Come down, honey.” The woman kissed her back on the forehead and putted her down with tenderness.
“But mommy! Jacky does not want to play with me!” said the little girl with a glimpse of sadness in her big blue eyes.
“Wait me a minute, would you?”
The little girl jumped again on the woman. “But nobody wants to play with me!”
“Come down, honey.”
“Please play with me mommy! I beg you!”
“I can play with you.” Said the man with a smile on his face.
The little girl suddenly noticed the presence of the man and looked at him in the eyes.
“This is not your matter.” said the woman with indifference.
“I think it is.”
“No, it isn’t.”
“Mommy! Who is that?” the little girl asked with curiosity.
She looked at her mother and at the man.
“This is not your matter, honey.” said the woman.
“But who is he?” the little girl kept on asking.
“Go back in the playground, honey.”
“Wait... Mommy, I think I know him...”
“You don’t know him, honey.
“But his eyes, his eyes...”
“You don’t know him. Go back in the playground.”
She became a bit tense and seemed to have loose control over the situation.
“Jig, who is this little girl?” asked the man.
“Again, this is not your matter.”
“Who is she?”
The woman turned away. “Sorry, it’s getting late. I need to go back home.”
“Wait, Jig! Is she...?” The man shouted at her.
She turned her head back. “No, she isn’t.”
“Wait, she must be!”
“No, she isn’t.”
“Wait! how old are you, honey?” The man attempted to approach the little girl to have a closer look at her.
The woman took the hand of her daughter and pushed her away from him. “This is not your matter! And you, go back to your playground!”
“I know it’s her!”
“No, she isn’t.”
“It’s her! It must be her!”
“It’s enough. I need to leave. Goodbye.”
The woman took the hand of her daughter and they went away together in the horizon.
“Daddy!”
The word suddenly came out from the little girl’s mouth.
The little girl detached herself from her mother. She ran back towards the man, laughing with joy and jumped on him in the same way she jumped on her mother. She also gave him a warm hug and a sweet kiss on the nose. The man was surprised and looked at her without knowing what to do, just as if he was paralyzed by her brightness. He noticed that they both have blue eyes. She smiled at him like a radiant sun and kissed him again on the nose. He finally kissed her back on the forehead, in the same way she was kissed by her mother on the forehead. They kept on hugging each other tight, letting the world around disappear in silence. The commuters, the pedestrians, the tourists, the pigeons, the fountain, the swings, the playground and the square itself did not exist anymore on that day.
The woman did not interfere.
She just silently looked at her daughter and her daughter’s father.
2018.04.15