大晚上突然收到一首歌
gaga女士的I'll never love Again
知道她提名奥斯卡了已经，不过电影我还没看，倒是先听到这首歌了
听的第一遍，强烈的那种共鸣真的油然而生。情感充沛的演绎，完美的唱功，这还是那个pork face的演绎者gaga吗，真好，我的收藏歌手里又多了一位。gaga不亚于惠特尼休斯顿，阿黛尔，碧昂斯了吧，满分。
但是，感情好像其实还是集中在了歌词。爱情真的是古今中外的追求啊，这多么虚无缥缈的东西。
我的爱情启蒙大概是罗马假日，本来以为是流星花园，却回想起来发现那时候的我压根没理解剧情，甚至回忆起来都只是觉得衣服好漂亮学校还可以是那样的啊，关注点大概偏离剧情了。罗马假日类似于几日游罗马吧，但是从剧情里，发现了依赖，尊重，责任，不忍……可能爱情大概就是，内心难过面对你却要展示笑容，或者夏目漱石的今晚夜色真美。
爱情很难得吗，好像未必。电视剧里随处可见的兜兜转转又在一起开心大结局的爱情故事一大把，古典名著里也是西厢记一样的梦幻故事；西方世界的傲慢与偏见。以及我们身边那些领证的爱情。毕业以前的我都是这样认为的吧至少。
这几年，身边朋友三三两两都结婚了，轮到自己了，才发现，原来这实在是件几乎绝迹的事情。生活里存在的，电视剧后面开撕的明星，一生独自生活的简奥斯丁，还有我身边那些看起来摇摇欲坠却坚强的在持续的婚姻。很多人，就那样在一起了，就那样过了，就那样一辈子了，多少次我以为就要不行的日子却原来也在继续前进。可是，那些人的婚姻里的温情，多少是爱情多少是相伴一生的亲情，我分的太清楚于是太孤独。
可是我也有喜欢的爱情，父母爱情这部电视剧应该是我的向往了。东环路我大概要记一辈子了，野兽派大概也是我这辈子要坚守的牌子，这辈子大概这样的表白收到一次也就足够了吧。额头冒出来的汗水，那么诚恳的语言，发抖的身体，那双一直眨呀眨的眼睛……夜幕下那个提着野兽派鲜花的大男生…回想起来原来是那天我收到了这辈子最值得承诺…我不知道意志这么不坚定的我是否能坚持下去，是否会爱上别人，只是我知道，你把这辈子愿意倾注的感情一次都给了我，小和尚，爱你你知道吗2017年12月25日
Wish I could, I could've said goodbye
I would've said what I wanted to
Maybe even cried for you
If I knew it would be the last time
I would've broke my heart in two
Tryin' to save a part of you
Don't wanna feel another touch
Don't wanna start another fire
Don't wanna know another kiss
No other name falling off my lips
Don't wanna give my heart away
To another stranger
Or let another day begin
Won't even let the sunlight in
No, I'll never love again
I'll never love again, oh, oh, oh, oh
When we first met
I never thought that I would fall
I never thought that I'd find myself
Lying in your arms
And I want to pretend that it's not true
Oh baby, that you're gone
'Cause my world keeps turning, and turning, and turning
And I'm not moving on
Don't wanna feel another touch
Don't wanna start another fire
Don't wanna know another kiss
No other name falling off my lips
Don't wanna give my heart away
To another stranger
Or let another day begin
Won't even let the sunlight in
No, I'll never love
I don't wanna know this feeling
Unless it's you and me
I don't wanna waste a moment, ooh
And I don't wanna give somebody else the better part of me
I would rather wait for you, ooh
Don't wanna feel another touch
Don't wanna start another fire
Don't wanna know another kiss
Baby, unless they are your lips
Don't wanna give my heart away
To another stranger
Don't let another day begin
Won't let the sunlight in
Oh, I'll never love again
Never love again
Never love again
Oh, I'll never love again