I want a GOD.

Being alone is one of the most real things in a man's whole life. 

People who remember this by heart will not be failed by others. 

And this is also why we actually need some GOD badly, even if the GOD is only a product of your mind . We need this to make ourselves relived. 

I want a GOD, too, but I want a real one, not one that pictured by others or myself. I can't persuade myself into believing the Christ, because I can't understand the stories and the dogmas, many of them are not logical to make me believe and I'm not kind enough to be able to love everyone,instead, I ignore them or even despise them.

It seems that most of the time, I feel nothing or just not happy, I worry about too many trivial things, they make me upset and anxious even if I clearly know that is absolutely necessary.

I am looking for something through my entire life, sometimes I find that I had made it, while later, it becomes another thing and I restart the journey again. And, this repeats. 

When I'm alone and happy, I need a GOD to share my happiness with; When I'm alone and sad, I need a GOD to share my sadness with; When I'm alone,confused and tired, I need a GOD, badly, to guide me and to company me. 

However, this,seems can never come true.