一. 我的邮件原文及课后改写
1. 原文（划线处是写得不好的地方）
Dear Sir/Madam,
I'm an Uber user and my account's linked mailbox is [email protected]. I'm writing to request a refund.
Yesterday I called a shared ride with Uber in SanFrancisco and the estimated price was six dollars. Since my Uber app didn't show correctly, I called the driver Daniel. He confirmed the order was for a shared ride and he had already received it. But after getting off I found the price was 15 dollars on my app.
So please check out the attachment for my e-receipt. If it was wrong, would you please refund my money? I look forward to your reply. If you have any questions, let me know as soon as possible. Thank you inadvance.
Sincerely,
Kate
2. 改写
Dear Sir/Madam,
I'm writing to request an overcharge and request a refund. For your reference, my email address linked to Uber is [email protected].
Yesterday I called a shared ride with Uber and the estimated price was $6. Since the iPhone app didn't show "request confirmed", I called the driver Daniel to double-check the order. He confirmed the request and it's a shared ride. But after getting off I found the shared ride cost me $15, not $6.
Attached is the e-receipt. If not a full refund, I would like to request a refund of the overcharged portion. Looking forward to hearing from you. Thank you in advance!
Sincerely,
Kate
二. 邮件写作的注意事项
1. 邮件的写作本质：清晰、高效和换位的书面沟通（Effective email writing = formulaic patterns + clear thinking + empathy）
2. 写作前思考：who, why, what
3. 表达简洁、礼貌；换位思考，明确必写的细节；使用Google搜索具体的邮件写作场景
三. 邮件写作的套路
1. Justin 的邮件例文（130字）
Subject: Shared ride overchange and refund request （好的标题：简洁，可知晓相关性，能够内容预判）
To Whom It May Concern: （不知对方身份时的称呼）
I am writing to report an overcharge and request a refund. For your reference, my email address linked to Uber is [email protected]. （开头段开门见山）
Yesterday afternoon I made an Uber shared ride request which was priced at $6. As the iPhone app interface didn't show "request confirmed" or a similar notification, I called the driver Daniel to double-check first that he confirmed the request, and second it's a shared ride. After I got off the car, I realized the shared ride cost me $15, not $6. （最后将两个价格放在一起便于读者查阅）
Attached is the e-receipt. I would like to request a refund of the overcharged portion, i.e. $9, if not a full refund.（结尾重申诉求）
Looking forward to hearing from you. Thank you so much!
Yours,
Kate
2. 标题：简洁可预判；如紧急可注明Urgent；酌情添加必要细节（如人名、时间、金额）
3. 不知对方身份时的称呼
(1) To Whom It May Concern:
(2) Dear Sir/Madam,
(3) Hello xxx surpport team/customer service team,
(4) Hello/Hey there,
4. 开头的万能句型
I'm writing to request/inquire/complain/comfirm...
For your reference, my email address linked to X is Y.
5. 结尾的万能句型
Attached is X.
I am attaching X to this email.
The attached file is the document that you requested.
I would like to request...
Looking forward to hearing from you.
Thank you in advance!/Thank you so much!
四. 学习表达
telepathy 心灵感应术
broadly applicable 广泛适应
triple- 三次
visual singposts 视觉提示
the unused portion 未使用的部分
turn something around
good gesture
relevance 相关性
characters 字符
mindfulness 注意
paragraphing 分段
hiccup = glitch
empathetic person
unaware 不知道的
Small hongbao. Big thanks.