英语魔鬼词典之朝花夕拾

英语魔鬼词典，是以一种另类的sarcastic 风格给予英语词汇一种出人意表的定义：

1. Apartment : A place to throw your money away on rent before you throw money on a mortgage .

公寓：一个让你把钱浪费在按揭上之前先把钱浪费在租金上的地方。

2. Acne : Nature's way of telling you that you are not quite ready to having sex .

青春痘：大自然告诉你还没到可以有性行为的一种方式。

3. Bar : A place where lonely , desperate people go to get hammered enough to find other lonely, desperate people irresistible .

酒吧：一个寂寞抓狂的人士去买醉，醉到觉得其它寂寞抓狂人士魅力无法挡的地方。

4. Breasts : Milk-producing glandular organs located between the neck and torso of a woman . When described in this way , one can observe how any component of sexual attraction is removed from the equation , so a rational discussion of these miracles of nature can ensue . This should last about eight seconds , at which point somebody is going to break down and call them “funbags .”

乳房：位于女人脖子与身躯之间的产奶分泌器官。谁都看得出来，这样的描述抹杀了它的性吸引力，引发出对这一造化神秀的理性讨论。这种讨论会持续八秒钟，然后有人会精神崩溃，把它们称为“包二奶。”

5. Chauffeur : A man whose job it is to continue looking straight ahead while people have sex in his back seat.

专职司机：此人的工作，就是有人在他汽车后座啪啪啪时仍目不斜视紧盯着正前方。

如果你有类似好玩的魔鬼词汇，不妨拿出来与大家“奇文共欣赏。”