Hello everyone, this is Helen Huang @ Organizing, based in Beijing, China. In order to better learn and practice the YiXiaoNeng Time Management System, after finished publishing 100 Chinese articles, I decided to continue writing and publishing a daily English article in another 100 days based on the "YeWuBin Time Management 100 Episodes" audio program. Today is the 147th day.
Today's topic is: Find your lifetime success factor
Do you remember the concept of high altitude living? Do you also remember how I told you， we need to build long-term goals and focus on actions that work towards those goals each and every day?
Remember, in the beginning you may not be able to construct meaningful long-term goals for yourself. Don't force yourself. Instead, focus on short-term goals first, and then build on those goals. Create one year goals as a starting point.
I also talked about the dream board and how the Sudoku design can help you create goals that promote a balanced and purposeful life. Balance and long-term perspective are critical components of a purposeful life.
Today, I continue to share what it means to have well-balanced, long-term goals which increase human value, and promote happiness.
I once took a class, at Harvard University, on Happiness. The Harvard class asked the question: What should be the basis for life goals? In other words, what should be the foundation and purpose of these goals? What should the goal strive to achieve?
This course gave a very clear answer. The Harvard course taught me that: happiness and success are two different things! Success is not necessarily happiness, but happiness is always considered successful.
Harvard University believes that ... We should not seek wealth, fame and other similar goals, because none of these will produce lasting, internal happiness. Instead of creating goals that are distant and far beyond our current reach, choose step goals. Step goals are individual milestones on the way to a long-term goal. Think of it as steps along the way to a larger goal.
First of all, what is the goal of process or the idea of step goals? Harvard University states that our goals should be core goals that help us grow, help us build interpersonal relationships and contribute to society. These are three ways to accomplish core goals - goals to help us grow, build personal relationships and contribute to society. If you invest in these three areas, then you can acquire wealth and fame on the way.
So let's look at these in more detail.
First, we need to continue to grow，
Second, we need to be nice to people around us, in other words we need to develop our interpersonal relationships.
Third, we need to expand our contribution and value to the community, that is, to strangers.
Dale Carnegie said: a person's success is 15% by capacity and 85% by interpersonal relationships. What that means is 15% of your ability to have success in life is from something that's inside of you. But most of the 85% is from how you deal with people around you. Have great interpersonal relationships provides a great contribution to strangers and society. In essence, what Carnegie says is the same concept as Harvard University tell me.
Many Chinese philosophers also talk about this topic. So what is philosophy? Philosophy is a system of thinking. Chinese philosophy speaks of "a learning both sound in theory and practice". The four Chinese words used to construct this phrase mean: internally to become saints; externally to become the king. The Tao Te Ching also says that we should cultivate or improve our self and regulate the family, country and the world.
Then how can we continue to grow? I have said several times before: We need deliberate and repetitive practice. If you can find one thing you like, then you can grow more continuously and rapidly then if you didn't have the kind of focus.
Life does not consist in how many things you do, but doing some things or one thing very well. Master your craft. If you can find what you like, you will repeat it and continually it, you will develop your strengths and abilities in this aspect, and finally you will use this ability to serve other people.
Even the originator of time management, the creater Peter Drucker, when speaking about the purpose of business enterprises, said: The purpose of an enterprise is to create customer needs, and the existence of enterprises contributes this to society. Similarly, if a person is alive, he must contribute to society.
Next, let's have a look at Harvard University's logic. I see it in three circles.
First, we need to do happy things. Because happiness is a feeling that can last. Desire cannot make us succeed, but happiness can prolong things, and allow us to continue to grow;
Second, in the end happiness will help us to establish our own advantages;
Third, having advantages is not for ourselves. Our more important mission is to meet the needs of others, and to serve us to have an existence that is meaningful to others and society;
The above three points I just mentioned are the factors of our success: happiness, advantage, and significance.
If what you are doing is in the intersection of these three aspects, then congratulations. If you still do not know how to do this, please take out a piece of white paper right now, write down what makes you happy, then write down your strengths, and finally write down what you think is meaningful to others and what you can do.
Draw these three circles, and respectively mark: happiness, advantage, meaningfulness. And then look at the things you wrote that fall in all three circles, which are those things: having happiness, advantage, meaningfulness, all at the same time.
I did this exercise five years ago after reading the Harvard University's Open Classes of Happiness, and then I realized that my three-circle intersection was "Performance". I like to study performance, and I am also skilled in performance, but I also think that improving the effectiveness of others makes sense.
I was lucky enough to find my own three-circle intersection. Of course, many friends may be temporarily unable to find it, so then what should you do if you can't find it? So I tell you to keep searching until you find it!
I invite you to list what makes you happy, list your own advantages and list what you feel is meaningful. Then list more things, and then see which items intersect with all three elements. I truly hope that through this exercise, you too can find your own success factors.
Thank you being with me together today. Have a wonderful day!