马小秋秋言物语2第五十六章：不争而善胜

十年时光的成长，让集团很多部门都学会了“道法自然”，思想境界也都有了很大提升。我发现，专一在自己的事情上，不争不抢， 守住尺度的部门与员工都获得了好结果。专一和守信，实在太难。但一旦做到，一定硕果累累。

我年轻时，大家贫富程度相当，注重理想与精神生活，怎么为集体和国家做贡献是主流思想。所以，虽然大家都不怎么富裕，反而幸福指数要高很多。而现在的人们很多时候都被一种无形的焦虑所控制。一些为吸引眼球而输出负能量的公众号也在推波助澜，“输在起跑线上你将一无所有”“同龄人正在抛弃你”“矜持一辈子不如嫁个这样的男人”这样贩卖焦虑的文章让人心神不宁、夜不能寐。人每时每刻都在为生存所需的各种资源操心，人与人之间的争斗也因生存焦虑而起。

快速发展的时代洪流中，人们总像在赶火车，站台上的怕挤不上去，挤上去的怕没有座位，有座位的觉得位置不够好，位置好的怕随时被人抢走。就如电影《当幸福来敲门》中被生计所迫的男主角看到开着法拉利去上班的股票经纪人发出的灵魂一问，“为什么我不能像他们一样幸福？”相信每个人心底都或多或少有过这样的想法。

我们在这样的环境里久了，自然会认为“争”才是对的，因为“不争的人吃亏”，而吃亏显得“傻”。那么，怎样使自己看起来“聪明” 呢？变得比别人更会争。于是盲目的蝇营狗苟、你争我夺， 造成当今最为“ 熙熙攘攘” 的人间万象。殊不知， 越争福越薄， 越争越没有。《道德经》中“不争而善胜”的境界，估计这样的人很难理解，或者也被归为“傻”。按他们的思维模式，在这个你争我夺、你有我无的世界中，不争就被动挨打了吗？

确实，要做到“善胜”，光“不争”是不够的。老子还说了， “水善利万物而不争”。要做到善胜的境界，还要去奉献自己有利万物。水虽然不争，但它没有闲着。它“居善地、心善渊、与善仁、言善信、正善治、事善能、动善时。夫唯不争， 故无尤”， 达到了“处众人之所恶而利万物”这个境界。万物都离不开它，它也就不需要去争了。

就如在一家企业中，处心积虑、争权夺利的人往往结局不好。而掌握核心技术的人，却到哪里都有自己不可替代的位置。如果你现在正像《幸福来敲门》的主角一样处于焦虑中，不如把那颗容易被影响、被牵引、神驰而外散的心收回来，调整自己的生活方式，守住自己的心，向内看，不要自觉卑微，因为天生我材必有用，每个人都有自己的天赋才华，重要的是你要发现它、找到它、修持它，一门深入，让它为公司、为大众服务，这样日积月累，我们就可以达到“不争而善胜”的境界了。

Love is a Journey of Self-Cultivation

Yesterday, when I was shopping in a supermarket, I overheard a girl talk   to her boyfriend.

She was angry. She was loud: “You are not coming to pick me up? Who are you with? You promised to have dinner with me! Why are you changing the plan now? I don’t believe it! I don’t want to hear this! You just want to hang out with them. Liar!” Yes, the girl was angry. I saw the anger in her face and the tears in her eyes. This is a daily occurrence with young lovers nowadays. To be honest, I experienced the same emotions when I was young.

People love every day, and they suffer every day. Love has become like the campfire of all emotions. Around this campfire, most people sing the same song, a popular song, a song of confusion. Confusion is indeed an accurate description of love. Why do men and women fall in love? Why do we love? Why is love so selfish? These questions have troubled me for a long time. The body (the vessel that holds life) is the result of reincarnation from many lives. In many reincarnations, desires were generated in us, and therefore we come into the world with different dispositions and emotions. Desires producing desires in a world where desires multiply. That’s asking for trouble. In such a vast world, and among so many people, why do I love you? The “you” is the result of cause and effect, something accumulated in previous lives that will play out in this world. Love without reason—a cause— doesn’t exist on this planet, nor does hatred exist without a reason. All the feelings we have are produced by seeds we have sown in previous lives.

Meeting him (or her) in this life is no accident. Once we understand these two points, we can find a solution to the problem we face. Everyone wants to be happy. Everyone wants to avoid suffering. The purpose of love is to make each other happy; but in reality, the deeper the love, the deeper the anguish. We love the other person so much that we concentrate all of our attention and support on the other. In the process, we begin to possess and control in the name of love, unaware that we are actually loving ourselves instead of the other person.

We want to control the other. Love, in general, is a selfish behavior. We cannot make everyone happy, but we should at least learn to let the person we love live and work with a sense of freedom and joy. We should learn to be open-mind and to help each other live a happy life, for as long as possible.