真实记录：临终前，最遗憾的5件事

A palliative nurse recorded the most common regrets of the dying and put her findings into a book called “The Top Five Regrets of The Dying.”

一个做临终关怀的护士记录了人们垂死前的最常见的一些憾事，她把自己的发现整理成书，叫做《临终前人生五大憾事》。

It’s not surprising to see what made the list as they are all things that touch each of our lives as we struggle to pay attention to and make time for things that we truly love.

组成这个清单里的平凡小事并不让人感到惊讶，因为我们也在为我们所钟爱的事情努力奋斗的历程中，它们触及我们生活的方方面面。

It’s important to remember that whatever stage we are at in life, there is no need for regret. The process of regret is one that provides nothing but suffering for ourselves as we begin to allow the past to dictate how we should feel now. Instead, we can use the past as a reference point to understand what adjustments we would like to make moving forward.

那就是不管我们处于人生的什么阶段，要记得没有必要去后悔，这是很重要的事情。如果我们纵容往事的悔恨侵蚀内心，那么除了痛苦，后悔将让我们一无所获。相反，我们可以利用过往做为参考点，理清我们的生活中有需要做出调整的地方，并向前看。

Below is the list of each regret along with an excerpt from the book.

下面是这书中记录的每种憾事的节选。

I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

我希望有勇气活出真实的我，而不是别人期望我活成什么样。

“This was the most common regret of all. When people realize that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled.

这是最常见的人生遗憾。当人们意识到他们自己命不久亦，回顾自己这辈子时，就很容易知道自己有多少梦想没有实现。

Most people had not honored even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made. Health brings a freedom very few realize, until they no longer have it.”

很多人在这辈子连一半的梦想都没有实现。直到临死前才明白，这是因为他们所做出的选择和没能做出的选择。在失去健康之前，极少数人会意识到健康所带来的自由（有多重要）。

I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.

我希望自己没那么努力的工作

Men missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. Women also spoke of this regret, but as most were from an older generation.They regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.

（大多数）男性会错过了孩子的青春期以及爱人的陪伴。有些女性也会说到这个遗憾，但大部分是比较年长的人。他们后悔把此生大部分时间花在了日复一日单调的工作上。

I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.

我希望我曾有勇气表达出我的感受

“Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.”

许多人为了和其它人和平相处一直在压抑自己的情感。这导致，他们满足于自己平庸的存在，因此也不可能变成他们真正可以成为的样子。（他们的内在）的愤怒和不满，往往会让他们患上许多疾病。

I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

我希望可以跟老友们一直保持联系

“Often they would not truly realize the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.”

“许多人直到临终前几周才意识到老友带给自己的好处，但这些老友往往早就消失在茫茫人海中。许多人一生都困在自己的生活里，让这些黄金友谊随着时间而慢慢消逝。每人个在临终前都非常想念他们的老朋友。

I wish that I had let myself be happier.

我希望能让自己更快乐

This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realize until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called ‘comfort’ of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others that they were content, when deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.

这一条让人出乎意料。许多人直到最后也没能意识到快乐是一种选择。他们深陷在固有的生活模式和习惯中。被称为“舒适区”的熟悉感充斥着他们的情感生活和物质生活。因为害怕改变他们在其它人面前的伪装，看起来他们是满足的，但在内心的深处，他们渴望能在生命中再次哈哈大笑，（适当地）犯糊涂。

Life is short, so break some rules, forgive quickly, kiss slowly, love truely, laugh uncontrollably, and never regret anything that made you smile.

从现在开始，享受生活，活在当下！

翻译：Becky

编辑：婉婕、芒果