Reading Journal - The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck
20180128-29 Chapter 8 The Importance of Saying No
-Q & A
1. Why saying no is important? Have you had a hard time of turning down someone’s request( for example, you wanted to say no, but what came out of your mouth was yes, and next day you kicked yourself for saying yes) ? Please include a personal story.
Because saying no makes your life better by saving you time to do what you really like or value.
I used to have a hard time of turning down somone's request, especially those form my family and friends. For example, once one of my good friends "invited" me to try a new restaurant with her. I really didn't want to go, but I was afraid of hurting her feelings. So I agreed. But during the whole meal I was very upset and easily to be pissed off, which in return made my friend unhappy.
2. Why Saint Petersburg was one of the Mark’s favorite trips?
Because here he got real liberation though accepting rejection and had a chance to reexamine his old values and metrics about honest.
3. Why commitment gives you freedom?
Because, on one hand, there some experiences that we can have only when we spend a long time on them; on the other hand, commitment directs our attention and focus toward those real important things in life.
4. How to build trust?
On one hand, we had better keep honest all the time.
One the other hand, if someone breaks the trust, the trust-breakers should first admit the true values that caused the breach and own up to themselves, and second, they can build a solid track record of improved behaviour over time.
- Take-away message -
作者在谈到旅行时说，旅行给你一个机会去见识那些与你原来所深信不疑的完全不一样却能好好存在于这个世界的东西，从而让你思考并且重塑自己原有的价值观。其实读书也是这样，看不同的作者，读不同的故事，就是不停地刷新自己的原有的认知。怪不得古人说要读万卷书，行万里路。
- Words & Expressions -
001 commit （熟词生义）
原文：“so why would I ever commit to a single person, or even a single social group, a single city or country or culture?”
释义：v. to give someone your love or support in a serious and permanent way
造句：He has not yet committed to any girl he had dated with.
002 overbearing
原文：“An overbearing mother may take responsibility for every problem in her children’s lives.”
释义：adj. always trying to control other people without considering their wishes or feelings
造句： I wish I won't be an overbearing mother in the future.
003 lose your marbels (informal)
释义：to start begaving in a crazy way
同义词： go mad
004 dynamic （熟词生义）
原文：“I remember discussing this dynamic with my Russian teacher one day, and he had an interesting theory.”
释义：n. the way in which things or people behave, react, and affect each other
造句：The possitive dynamics of the family is of great significance.
005 grant (formal)
原文：“Freedom grants the opportunity for greater meaning, but by itself there is nothing necessarily meaningful about it.”
释义：v. to give someone something or allow them to have something that thet have asked for
造句：He would love to be able to grant all of his girlfriend's wishes.