From: the 7 habits Of highly effective people
Author: Steven R covey
Translator: 一切都还不晚
译文仅供个人学习,不用于任何形式商业目的,转载请注明原作者、文章来源、翻译作者,版权归原文作者所有。
Before going any further, I invite you to have an intellectual and emotional experience. Take a few seconds and just look at the picture below and carefully describe what you see.
在深入讨论这个问题之前,我想邀请你来做一个有关智力与情商的实验。请花几秒钟的时间看看下面这个图片,并仔细描述你的所见。
Do you see a woman? How old would you say she is? What does she look like? What is she wearing? In what kind of roles do you see her?
你看到了一个妇人?你认为她芳邻几何?她的模样如何?她穿着什么样的衣服?在你的印象中这样的女人一般会是什么角色?
You probably would describe the woman in the first picture to be about 25 years old—very lovely, rather fashionable with a petite nose and a demure presence. If you were a single man you might like to take her out. If you were in retailing, you might hire her as a fashion model.
或许你会说图片1中的这个女人是25岁左右,恬静的外表加上高挺的鼻梁让她看起来非常可爱,如果你是一个单身男性或许会考虑和她约会,如果你是卖服装的,你可能会考虑雇佣她为时尚模特。
But what if I were to tell you that you're wrong? What if I said this picture is of a woman in her 60's or 70's who looks sad, has a huge nose, and is certainly no model. She's someone you probably would help across the street.
但是,假如我告诉你看错了你会怎么想呢?假如我说这张图片上描绘的女人看起来有60、70岁了,有着巨大的鼻子,也不是模特,有可能就是某个在大街上需要你搀扶着过马路的老人。
Who's right? Look at the picture again. Can you see the old woman? If you can't, keep trying. Can you see her big hook nose? Her shawl?
谁是对的呢?再来看看这个图片,你能看得出她是一个老人吗?如果没有的话,试着再仔细看看,你能看到她那巨大的弯钩鼻子,还有她的头巾吗?
If you and I were talking face to face, we could discuss the picture. You could describe what you see to me, and I could talk to you about what I see. We could continue to communicate until you clearly showed me what you see in the picture and I clearly showed you what I see.
如果你和我面对面交流的话,我们就可以讨论这张图片,我们就可以向对方描述我们看到了什么,直到我们都清楚的知道了我们对彼此的描述。
Because we can't do that, turn to picture 2 and study the picture there and then look at this picture again. Can you see the old woman now? It's important that you see her before you continue reading.
由于我们无法这样做,那么我们来研究下第二张图片,现在你能看出这是一个老妇人了吗?在你继续阅读之前,你必须要看清楚了,这是很重要的。
I first encountered this exercise many years ago at the Harvard Business School. The instructor was using it to demonstrate clearly and eloquently that two people can see the same thing, disagree, and yet both be right. It's not logical; it's psychological.
多年以前我还在哈佛商学院时,我第一次经历了这样的一个实验。我的教授就是使用这样的图片向我们清晰的演示并证明了,两个人即便是在看同样的一件事物,也会存在不同的观点,而且都可能是正确的,这无关逻辑,而关乎心理。
He brought into the room a stack of large cards, half of which had the image of the young woman you saw on picture 1, and the other half of which had the image of the old woman on picture 2.He passed them out to the class, the picture of the young woman to one side of the room and the picture of the old woman to the other. He asked us to look at the cards, concentrate on them for about ten seconds and then pass them back in. He then projected upon the screen the picture you saw on picture 3 combining both images and asked the class to describe what they saw. Almost every person in that class who had first seen the young woman's image on a card saw the young woman in the picture. And almost every person who had first seen the old woman's image on a card saw an old woman in the picture.
教授将一大推大卡片拿到教室里来,有一半的卡片上画着第一张图片上的妇人,另外一半上画着第二张图片上的妇人。教授将卡片都发给了大家,一边的学生拿到了绘制着年轻妇人的卡片,另一边的学生拿到绘制着年老的妇人。教授让我们盯着卡片看上10秒钟,然后把他们收回去,同时在大屏幕上偷窃了一张以上两张图片合成的照片,然后询问大家看到了什么,几乎所有刚才拿到那个画有年轻妇人照片的同学们都说看到的是一个年轻的妇人,而另外的所有刚才拿到那个画有老妇人照片的同学都说看到的是一个老妇人。
The professor then asked one student to explain what he saw to a student on the opposite side of the room. As they talked back and forth, communication problems flared up.
这时教授让其中的一个学生向另外一个学生解释他的所见时,随着他们不断的讨论,他们之间的问题也随之而来。
"What do you mean, 'old lady'? She couldn't be more than 20 or 22 years old!”
"有没有搞错,你看到了一个'老妇人'我认为她的年龄不会超过22岁!"
"Oh, come on. You have to be joking. She's 70—could be pushing 80!"
"噢,你不是在开玩笑吧,她应该有70甚至超过80岁了!"
"What's the matter with you? Are you blind? This lady is young, good looking. I'd like to take her out. She's lovely."
你是什么情况?难道你眼睛看不见了吗?这个女人还很年轻,容貌娇好,我都想和她约会呢!她是如此的可爱!"
"Lovely? She's an old hag."
"可爱?她就是个老巫婆!"
The arguments went back and forth, each person sure of, and adamant in, his or her position. All of this occurred in spite of one exceedingly important advantage the students had—most of them knew early in the demonstration that another point of view did, in fact, exist—something many of us would never admit. Nevertheless, at first, only a few students really tried to see this picture from another frame of reference.
争论来来回回,每个人都坚信他们自己才是对的,坚持自己的观点。虽然很多学生很早之前就知道在这一演示过程中一定会存在与自己不同的观点,但是他们当中的很多人是绝对不会承认这一事实的。然而,一开始的时候,还是有几个学生会真正的尝试着从对方的思维框架里观察这副画。
After a period of futile communication, one student went up to the screen and pointed to a line on the drawing. "There is the young woman's necklace." The other one said, "No, that is the old woman's mouth." Gradually, they began to calmly discuss specific points of difference, and finally one student, and then another, experienced sudden recognition when the images of both came into focus.
激烈的讨论以后,一个学生径直走向大屏幕,然后指着画面上的一条线说"这就是年轻妇人的脖子",话音刚落就有学生站起来反驳说,"不可能,这明明就是老妇人的嘴巴。"渐渐的,他们开始平静的交流他们看到的不同特征,一个接一个的表达自己的看法,当聚焦到两幅画,所有参与实验的学生的认知也发生了改变。
Through continued calm, respectful, and specific communication, each of us in the room was finally able to see the other point of view. But when we looked away and then back, most of us would immediately see the image we had been conditioned to see in the ten-second period of time.
通过持续的平和,相互尊重,更加细致的交流,最终我们每个人都能看到其他的观点,但是,当我们转移视角,再回过头去看时,我们中的绝大多数人都能立即发现我们在之前10秒钟之内看到的图像。
I frequently use this perception demonstration in working with people and organizations because it yields so many deep insights into both personal and interpersonal effectiveness. It shows, first of all, how powerfully conditioning affects our perceptions, our paradigms. If ten seconds can have that kind of impact on the way we see things, what about the conditioning of a lifetime? The influences in our lives—family, school, church, work environment, friends, associates, and current social paradigms such as the Personality Ethic—all have made their silent unconscious impact on us and help shape our frame of reference, our paradigms, our maps.
我经常在与别人以及组织合作时使用这一感知演示实验,因为他能在个人效能以及人与人之间的效能上产生非常多的深刻见解。它首先向我们展示了环境因素对我们的感知和思维定式的影响是非常大的。如果连这10秒钟的时间就能对我们看待问题的方式产生如此大的影响,那更何况是一生之久啊!这该会对我们在家庭里,学校里,教堂里,工作中,朋友间,社团里,以及如今流行的人格魅力这样的思维定式上产生多么大的影响啊!而且,这些影响都是存在于悄然之间,塑造着我们的思维框架,我们的思维定式以及我们的人生地图。
It also shows that these paradigms are the source of our attitudes and behaviors. We cannot act with integrity outside of them. We simply cannot maintain wholeness if we talk and walk differently than we see. If you were among the 90 percent who typically see the young woman in the composite picture when conditioned to do so, you undoubtedly found it difficult to think in terms of having to help her cross the street. Both your attitude about her and your behavior toward herhad to be congruent with the way you saw her.
这也向我们表明了这种思维定式就是我们行为态度的源泉,没有他们的指引我们就不能表现得诚实,如果我们的所作所为有别于我们的所见所闻,那我们就不能保持纯。如果你是那典型的90%的人中的一个,你将看到的就是一个年轻的妇人,那么毫无疑问你将很难提前想到要搀扶着她过马路,所有你对她的言行举止都将和你看待她的方式保持一致。
This brings into focus one of the basic flaws of the Personality Ethic. To try to change outward attitudes and behaviors does very little good in the long run if we fail to examine the basic paradigms from which those attitudes and behaviors flow.
这引发了我们对人格魅力缺陷的关注,长期来看,假如我们不能审视我们的基本思维定式,那么试图去改变外在的行为态度也只会是无义之举,因为我们的行为态度来源于我们的思维定式。
This perception demonstration also shows how powerfully our paradigms affect the way we interact with other people. As clearly and objectively as we think we see things, we begin to realize that others see them differently from their own apparently equally clear and objective point of view. "Where we stand depends on where we sit."
这一感知演示实验也向我们表明了思维定式在人际交往过程中的强大影响力,当我们越是能够清晰客观的看待问题,我们也将会明白之所以别人也有不同的观点,那也是基于他们自己的观点,他们也同样认为他们是清晰客观的看待了问题。我们的立场取决于我们坐在哪里。
Each of us tends to think we see things as they are, that we are objective. But this is not the case. We see the world, not as it is, but as we are—or, as we are conditioned to see it. When we open our mouths to describe what we see, we in effect describe ourselves, our perceptions, our paradigms. When other people disagree with us, we immediately think something is wrong with them. But, as the demonstration shows, sincere, clearheaded people see things differently, each looking through the unique lens of experience.
我们每个人都倾向于认为我们看到的就是事实,都认为我们是非常客观的,但是事实却不是如此,我们看待这个世界,看到并不是他本身,而是我们自己,或者说是我们习惯看到世界。当我开口描述我们所见,实际也是在描述我们自己的认知与思维定式。当别人反对我们时,我们会立马认为他们是错的,但是正如上面的认知演示实验向我们所展示的一样,诚实的,头脑清晰的人看待问题的方式是不同的,他们能从独特的经验中看待问题。
This does not mean that there are no facts. In the demonstration, two individuals who initially have been influenced by different conditioning pictures look at the third picture together. They are now both looking at the same identical facts—black lines and white spaces—and they would both acknowledge these as facts. But each person's interpretation of these facts represents prior experiences, and the facts have no meaning whatsoever apart from the interpretation.
这并不是意味着没有事实,在上面的实验里,两个人在看第三张图片时就是被最初看到的两张不同的图片影响着,他们都是看到了完全相同的事实-黑色的线条与空白,而且他们都认同这个事实,但是每个人阐述的事实都代表着先前的经验,抛开这些解释,事实是没有任何意义的。
The more aware we are of our basic paradigms, maps, or assumptions, and the extent to which we have been influenced by our experience, the more we can take responsibility for those paradigms, examine them, test them against reality, listen to others and be open to their perceptions, thereby getting a larger picture and a far more objective view.
我们对自己的思维定式,人生地图或者假定的意识越强,我们受到过往经验的影响越广,我们就越能对我们的思维定式负责,就会审视他们,依照现实去检验他们,并能保持开放的心态去倾听别人接受别人的观念,只有这样我们才能获得更加宏达和客观的视野!
The End!