留英日记（十七）

What do you want?

This is what Avelina asked me. she is one of my flatmates. I just knew originally the capital of Mexico is Mexico City because of her. She is a lovely girl and every single time we meet in the kitchen in the morning, we smile and look at each other. One night in Half Moon, a pub nearby Albert Stern House. We were drinking Tequila. it's too early to celebrate Christmas day but I still don't feel I am in the holiday.

"I like you." She said and her face turned red. I felt excited but still have some stress to receive her beautiful sights.I said"I like you too."

"But you are younger than me and I don't think you are sure that what do you want actually, do you?”

Yes, I do. I mean when you left and travelled in other countries. I missed you.
Yes, you are right. I don't know whether I don't know.

A few days ago, one of my dear old friends made a phone call to me. He got lots of troubles and need a loyal listener, like me. He complained a lot about how back luck he got stolen and how difficult he makes money and how boring he lives with his girlfriend. He wants different girlfriends, a lot of new and hot girlfriends.He said" you know. As a man, I just want to try different."

I have zero ideas to say anything or I do not want to continue this conversation.
"What if life is just not what you thought about, and what if it is the same for the differences and you, just one of the cowards who are afraid of facing the truth of life, even though the truth is in front of you, and you, the man, choose to ignore Who should complain?"

Although I am younger than you, it doesn't mean I am not able to take good care of you. what's more, maybe I know what I want.

I want a simple life but not that simple. a simple life doesn't mean it is not poetic.
I want to be a person who is likely to listen to you with patience because I understand good things always take time, like happiness.
I want when I wake up earlier than you and you are turned to face me ,
face on the pillow and hair spread around. I take chance and stare at you, amazed in love and afraid that I couldn't see your eyes again.
I want a person can attract me to think of one difficult question
"what reason is there for anything, without love and you?"
I want a person who loves life and can grow up together.
I want a person. if she ever left me , I would tear my hear out and never put it back. There will never be anyone like her.
But I know sometimes I am being told myself. I like some girls but it doesn't mean I need to have a relationship with one of them.
Just thanks
Thousands of thanks for showing up in my life.